Revera King Gardens is NOT the retirement home you want your parents to be in.
Background – My Mom chose to move into Revera King Gardens in Mississauga at the age of 99.75 in September 2014 when she was still ambulatory and able to get to the dining room. It was FINE then, especially at just over $3000 per month.
Last November (2015) she suffered a fall during which she broke her hip and spent 2 months in rehab in Mississauga General Hospital.
On returning to King Gardens in late December, we had her moved to the assisted living floor because her ambulatory functions had deteriorated substantially, along with her eyesight and cognitive abilities.
That amounted to another $1700 per month for someone to come in and help her get dressed and undressed and drop off a meal tray 3 times a day.
By request from a concerned friend of hers, I flew out to visit my Mom last week and was totally disgusted by the situation I found her in there.
There has been NO effort made on the part of staff to get her out of her room or involved with other people on the assisted living floor since her return.
Left to languish in her room for a couple of months; her ambulatory, cognitive and continence functions have deteriorated considerably.
The Revera King Gardens staff were AMAZED that she walked to the dining room while I was there.
Ya, I just sat with her for awhile and suggested that it would be good for her to do, i.e. walk a bit and talk with others.
My mom has always been a big walker and without that, she’s sad, depressed and deteriorating.
The dirtiness of her suite doesn’t help.
I found a big smear of SHIT left on her bedspread… that I cleaned up.
Found the dirty nighty in her laundry hamper and this rag that was used to clean up feces and then left on my mom’s coffee table.
This is the dirty cup she uses while brushing her teeth..
I made an appointment with the Director of Care at Revera King Gardens, Bronis Procek, and it was apparent that her main objective during our meeting was for me to sign an order to spend another $1900 per month to take care of my mother’s continence needs… which of course I did.
Now we’re spending $6700 per month, minimum and she’s still left to languish in her dirty suite for hours on end between meal times when they drop and pick up her tray.
They dress her, feed her and despite promises to check 5 times a day, leave her sitting in a wet diaper for hours.
Despite asserting that she is washed regularly, her hair was greasy and she complained of not being washed properly… i.e. ALL over.
So… what we’re looking at is having to get a full-time caregiver at $20 an hour, 40 hours per week, or another $3200 per month just to make sure my mother is properly cared for.
Money is not the issue here. LACK of proper care from an ‘assisted living’ center certainly is.
My mother, completely unable to get out to buy basic necessities is expected to supply her own soap and shampoo.
Sheesh… cheap hotels provide that for LESS than what she is now being charged per month.
Oh Ros, that’s horrible.
Both me and my daughter are disgusted. If you lived in our town I could point you to the right facility. Unfortunately, it’s 1 out of the 5 I’ve worked at. I was in nursing for over a decade in my youth, and still have lots of family that is. And I’m sorry to say that this is pretty common. As horrible as it is to say, our seniors don’t get the respect their age should demand.
I also want to say that as I’ve watched you talk about all you’re doing for your mom, the respect I have for you has grown immensely. I know some of the history, and you set an incredible example that others should pay attention to. Sadly, though I KNOW I’ll be one that’s there for my parents, so many aren’t. Again, from my experience, that’s where a huge line is drawn. So many are left alone to deal with this kind of care without an advocate.
Wish I could help more. But I’ll help by spreading the word. They messed with the wrong crowd 😉
Miss you lady!
Krys says “hi Ros”!
Yours, Brad.
Hey Brad,
Thanks kindly for stopping by to share your thoughts and for understanding. Means a lot to both my mom and I. Hi back to Krys and all the best to you both! 🙂
Hugs,
Ros
Hmmm.
Maybe move her to a place nearer to where you live, that way you
can check in more often. Family arriving unexpectedly makes a difference.
Here is a search engine that might help.
http://www.aplaceformom .com/search (this is for Canada)
Maybe a facility near a larger city might work better, or better yet call and
talk to an advisor and add a requirement for social interaction to the care requirements.
Animals help, does she like dogs or cats? In the U.S. many of the facilities have cats in house and often have visiting “dogs” …. in addition to group activities that even people in wheel chairs attend.
Isolation like you described isn’t beneficial.
She should still be attending therapy for walking, but if needed let her use a wheel chair so she can have some of her meals with the “group”.
Just because she needs more assistance, doesn’t mean she should be confined to her room and have meals delivered. Might as well be in solitary confinement.
Good Luck…
~Cararta
Hi Cararta,
I wish moving her closer was still an option, but there’s no way she (101 years old) could handle a 10-hour day of flying or 38 hours of driving over several days.
They do have dogs that come in, but only into the lounge areas, not into individual rooms.
Thanks for the good wishes… I’ll keep working at it. I just hope we can find her a better placement before it’s too late or she deteriorates further.
Cheers,
Ros
Yup, this is why we kept our parents at home and took care of them with the help of hospice workers.
Hi Ron,
Nice that you had that option. We didn’t because my mother refused to be proactive and now don’t due to distance and my mother’s health situation.
Ros
Totally agree with all you have experienced.
Working in aged care is no easy task.
If looking after our elderly were easy, then family would keep their mums and dads at home. So I’m just wondering. How do a few staff provide total care to multiple residents. It’s just not humanly possible to provide adequate care when the ratio of staff to resident is out of proportion. I used to work in an aged care facility where there was only x1 staff on night duty to lookout and care for aid and assist x60 residents overnight where most residents were double incontinent. Just not possible. Nursing is nuts at the best of times. But 60 to 1 vs a family at home ratio of x2 or more family looking after granma or granpa. It’s a tough call for family to put their loved ones in an old persons home. I totally agree. But spare a thought for care staff most of who are extremely pushed by management to do more then is possible then pay those staff piss poor wages work long hours and basically cop abuse from residents family management and fellow staff. Tough call. Me personally I want out of it. If family are unhappy with the care that is being provided then there’s always the option to take their mom or dad home and do a better job. But oh no… Family won’t do that. Why? Because it’s just to freakin hard that’s why. I wish that it wasn’t like this. But that’s the reality. Probably get better care in a prison. Or on a cruise ship. Take your mom home. And give her the love care and attention that she gave you when you were totally dependant on her when you were a child. Be part of the solution not part of the problem.
Albert,
For someone who doesn’t know me or my situation, you’ve judged me based on a lot of assumptions.
I spent 10 years asking my mother to move to where I live, so she could be closer to us when she needed us more care. She resisted every step of the way. She CHOSE this retirement residence, and now that she needs better long-term care, moving her across the country is no longer an option. There’s no facility into which she could be placed because she isn’t a resident here… not to mention that she couldn’t deal with the travel, either flying or driving.
Trust me, I’ve considered all the options and you apparently missed the point completely.
We’re now paying $7000 per month for care which she is not getting.
Get off your high horse and don’t judge people whose situations you know nothing about.
Rosalind
Hi Rosalind,
So sorry to see the conditions and the way that your poor mom is being cared for. I hope after the bad publicity they will improve their standards. Disgusting that institutions for the elderly operate in this manner. It would appear they are only in business for the money.
The government health department should be lobbied to do regular unannounced checks on these institutions.
We have the same problems here in South Africa.
Hope you find a better placement for her soonest.
Best wishes for you and your Mom.
Alfred.
Thanks, Alfred!
And I totally agree with your thought that the health department should do regular quality assurance checks. I’ll try to find out if they actually do that.
Cheers,
Ros
In my opinion, the blame for this situation is exclusively the residence. Paying $ 7,000 a month she should be treated like a queen and have available all necessary care. All necessary. The room is clean, there is no dust … why not be paid, that is basic and mandatory.